Friday, November 19, 2010

Mellor's Miracles and Muddles

I was just at the healing meeting held by a guy called John Mellor.

Tall guy, charismatic. Wearing a soft pink shirt....

So he talks about how healing happens. He prays over some people. He puts hands over the affected area, and yells various things including, "Shuum! Shuum!" And, "Free, now Jesus, NOW! NOW!" is a link to some of the stuff he's done.

It was weird. He prayed for person after person. He prayed for a guy in a wheelchair, and the dude's foot starts jumping around. The guy in the chair stares at his foot, rather puzzled.

"That hasn't happened before..."

Like, so many people said they could feel the difference. Most praised God. About twenty prayed for Jesus to become Lord of their lives. One guy threw his arms up in the air screaming, "Ashutuiposhugnu! Nyeghytuihpoto!" John dealt with that by slaying him in the Spirit. The guy went down. John shook his head. "You scared the livers out of me, mate."

There was a LOT of slaying in the Spirit. Sometimes he'd try and do it, and nothing would happen....the person would just blankly stare. Other times, he'd barely look in their direction and they started yelling and writhing on the floor. It was almost like he did it for fun, pointing his finger at them, and watching them drop.
 At one time, there were so many splayed across the floor, it looked like a War Zone.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting there, in a lot of pain. As the night goes on, the pain gets worse and worse....I haven't sat up for so long in two months. I grumbled to myself, "The Longer I sit here waiting to be healed, the more I need it!"

John turns to the crowd and announces that he will be praying for the whole of the crowd, and stretching out his hand towards the large auditorium, he begins to do so.

I place my hands on my back, and pray for healing. I hope for healing. I'm afraid of healing.

Nothing happens. Perhaps I relax a little. But no relief from the tension and pain.

He prayed for a lot of people. And everyone there was stretching out their own hands to whomever had been prayed for, all asking God for healing.

The friends who I had come with, announce they wish to leave. My car is parked over in the dark, so I leave, too, and get a ride to my car. This happens to coincide with the time that John declares everyone is welcome to come to the front to be prayed for.

It was sort of funny. I was sitting next to a chiropractor in the car, who asked me about my back difficulties, and offered to see me if I so wished. So I don't know if that was a bit of God-Intervention.

So the facts of the night.
- I chickened out of getting prayed for.
- I'm a confused mess.
- I think I'm a Pharisee, that I saw those people claim to be feeling better, and my heart is unchanged.
- My own pastor spoke out the front about how his neck was free of it's chronic pain.
- So all this good stuff happened, and I am unmoved.
- I don't feel like praising God.
- I feel like turning on Scrubs and ignoring everything that just happened, because I'm so damn frustrated by it.

I'm so frustrated that the people who really were demonstrably ill, mentally damaged, and in wheelchairs, and such didn't seem to receive healing anywhere near as much as those who had diseases no one could see or judge easily.

But I don't wanna have a hard heart in this! I don't know why God would only reach out sometimes, I don't have the fuzziest. So I fled. (Also, the pain is fairly severe....)

John kept assuring people that if they weren't healed immediately, it was highly likely that they would be healed in the next hour, day or week. In fact, "You might wake up tomorrow morning, pain free! Praise God, folks, we're seeing miracles here!"  And Kaity limps out the auditorium. I guess group prayer is not very effective. I guess healing only happens under the right circumstances, with the right person, when God is in the right mood.

So maybe I will wake up tomorrow with my pain gone.

Who knows?
 I hope so. I'm sore.

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